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Write More Goodly

Post by Cordelia on Mon Mar 14, 2016 11:50 pm

[Originally posted by Queenie on previous forum.]

Here's a thing I did, ever so quickly, based on a prompt. It's bad and not being submitted for critique and is not to be taken seriously as its own piece. Your mission, should you choose to accept it and you should 'cause it's fun, is to rewrite it, make it your own, and make it better. Have fun!!

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There he is, hovering at the door. I can taste his desire to walk in the room and enact his every dream. I stretch out one claw reflexively. I admit to a part of me that wishes he would step forward, that he would reach out and grab the girl, pull her to him - only then would my every dream come true. Only then could I live my own desires.

But he doesn't walk in. He hovers, debates, then leaves. I growl mentally and huddle in my cave under the bed. He never walks in and I doubt he ever will. He knows I am here, he can smell my presence even if he has no idea. I will protect the girl from him. My presence alone is enough to deter the man's actions. Someday, perhaps, if my prayers to the shadows are answered - someday he will push aside the misgivings of my scent. Someday he will take that step into the room. Someday he will reach for the girl, lust in gut and nothing in his heart. That will be the day I taste blood.

Hear me, Dark Mother, I beg of you. Let me drain him. There is nothing I want more than to feel his flesh give way between my teeth and rip beneath my talons. Please....please. I have served you well, and I need this.

No. You are eHarann, and you will guard the child well. You guarantee no harm comes her way. But to see your form emerge from beneath her bed; to witness your murder of her father, who - thanks to you - has never harmed her; would this not damage her? The reason for your being is to keep the girl healthy for our future purposes - we need her not only physically whole, but mentally as well. Stay strong, eHarann, and patient. Your time will come.
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Re: Write More Goodly

Post by Cordelia on Mon Mar 14, 2016 11:51 pm

[Reply originally posted by Specter of Death on previous forum.]

You are eHarann, and you will guard the child well.

I can taste his desire, feel the lust within his gut, and sense his empty heart. He stands at the door, debating, and questioning his urges, his dreams. He wants to enact them, wants to fulfill them, and make them come true. I hope that he does, so that I might embrace the deepest urges of my dark soul. The day he crosses that door's threshold, and approaches her, the day he reaches for her - then, and only then, would all of my deepest desires come true.

But he doesn't enter, he never enters. He only hovers over the door, a hand on the handle, contemplating. Then he retreats, away from his urges and desires. Does he know I'm here? In the depths of my cave under her bed, hoping that he turns the handle? I know that he can feel my breath, and smell my scent. One day, he may endure my overwhelming presence, and give in. He may reach for her, and allow me to take him, to carve and devour him. Allow me to tear away at him with my talons, and savor him with my deadly jaws.

Hear me, Mother. Mother of the Dark, I beg you to listen, to hear me. Let me drain him. I want nothing more than to destroy him, devour every morsel of his torn up body. Feel his flesh cut beneath the pressure of my claws. Please, hear me. I have served you well, well enough to deserve this reward.

No, for you are eHarran, and you guard this child well. You promise no harm will come to her, and protect her from those who wish to bring her harm. But what happens when she witnesses your form emerge from hiding, to witness the murder of her Father? The man who has never harmed her, due to your residence. Would this event not damage her? You exist to defend her, to keep her healthy for the future we have planned. We need her physically and mentally, do not risk that. Stay strong, my child, for your time will come.

~~8~~

Well, that was my attempt. Really kool exercise, I really enjoyed writing it all out and making it my own.
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